3 Ways to Justify your iPad Decision

With the relese of the iPad looming you're starting to see articles questioning the value of jumping on the iPad bandwagon sight unseen. For some examples check out Albert Wans nifty piece, or this exploration of the mania at Yahoo!

We'll grant that you don't need an iPad at this very second. You can assure yourself of this reality by noting you're living a full, rich and rewarding life without an iPad right now. That's great, we applaud your personal actualization and all, but even if you're coming up with reasons why you don't need an iPad, you also really want one.

So instead of rattling through the reasons why no one needs an iPad we'll give you some excuses to get one. After all, most of us buying an iPad are going to have to convince someone else why. That other person could be your wife or husband, your thrifty side or your bank account. Time to get the tools you need into your hands.

1. The iPad will pay for its self.

You're thinking about shelling out several hundred dollars for a bit of tech that you don't have  an immediate need for. That can be a tough sell. But you need to think ROI (return on investment) . If you buy an iPad you can

            get a smaller place (cheaper)

            sell off some furniture (so you can get a smaller place)

            spend less on software

Your thinking those benefits seem a little far fetched. How will an iPad let you live in a smaller place? Let you sell off furniture? Easy, look around your abode and find a bookcase. Now realize the bookcase is obsolete. Yep, once you get an iPad you're not going to need to store books. No need for books means you can get rid of the bookcases. Fewer bookcases means you need a smaller house/apartment. Plus, think of the long green you can rake in selling off those wonders of dead tree storage!

The cheaper software part is easy. Almost every bit of software on your computer is ridiculously over featured for anyone but a professional. If you're not a pro you'll be able to find some iPad equivalent for a fraction of the cost.

So, not only can you pay for the iPad when you sell off your Federalist era bookcase for hundreds of thousands of dollars the iPad will pay you back each month with lower software costs and lower housing costs. You can't afford not to buy an iPad.

2. The iPad will get you a better job/allow you to hook up/generate new friends

The iPad is just glass, aluminium and circuits, so you're wondering how it can do any of those things. Wonder no more. When you're one of the first people to have an iPad someone will see you using it. They'll ask you about the iPad. If that person is a powerful business type they'll be so impressed by your savvy they'll hire you as the iPad roll out specialist. If it is a member of the opposite sex they'll be so impressed by your foresight they'll want to fondle more than your iPad. If it's just an average Joe, well at least you made a new friend, someone to help you move the couch when you move into your new, smaller place. (Or if luck pans out your new bigger place since you landed that new fabulous iPad specialist gig.)

3. The iPad will make you rich

Because you'll be an early adopter you'll know how great the iPad is before everyone else. You can buy up scads of Apple stock (or sell it short). You'll be able to quit your job on your anticipated earnings and throw all your time in learning how to program for the thing (start here or iTunes U). Your app will be out fast, and since you're a smart Apple Matters reader your app will sell like crazy. You'll bathe in Dom Perignon with the app's earnings while shampooing your hair with diamonds purchased with the proceeds of your sale of Apple stocks. And you won't need a fancy hybrid, or flex fuel car. You'll roll around in a half-Ferrari, half-Hummer limo that runs off the combustion of hundred dollar bills.

Now for the bad news: If you haven't already signed up, you're not getting one. By the time you get your hands on the iPad it won't be "OMG iPad!" it will just be a polite nod from another person that also has one. Kind of like how complete strangers wave to each other when they are riding motorcycles. Sadly for you, you shortsighted fool, the nod of shared consumerism is only an acknowledgement of a shared interest. Not a path to personal wealth or self-financing techno-lust.

You do have one small window of hope. It turns out that people who ordered the iPad for pickup from the Apple Store have to pick it up by 3:00 PM. Any iPad not picked up by the appointed hour will be sold on a first come, first serve basis. So you could get in line in front of Apple Store right now in the anticipation that you'll be the first one to by an unclaimed iPad. But, and we're just being honest, that line is for losers.